November 2011 – Page 3 – The Good Funeral Guide

Back to business after the ‘blitz’

17 November 2011

Charles

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Categories: funeral customs

Posted by Richard Rawlinson

It may be the 300th anniversary of the completion of Sir Christopher Wren’s St Paul’s Cathedral but 2011 will be remembered as the year the great building closed to the public for the first time since the Blitz due to health and safety fears after anti-capitalist protesters set up camp on its doorstep.

I’m not sure how many funeral plans were put on ice due to the protesters but, as the nation’s church, St Paul’s has been a focal point for the remembrance of the departed, both famous and anonymous.

Margaret Thatcher is to receive the accolade of a State funeral at St Paul’s when she reaches the end of her days – the first Prime Minister since Sir Winston Churchill to be afforded such an honour. In 1965, the dramatic images of Churchill’s coffin, draped in the Union Jack, were broadcast to millions around the globe.

There have also been services marking the contributions made by ordinary men and women involved in conflicts in the Falklands, the Gulf and Northern Ireland. On another occasion, a large crowd gathered following the terrorist attacks on New York on 11 September 2001, as London expressed its solidarity at a time of grief. At the service of remembrance following the terrorist bombings in London in July 2005, young people representing different faith communities lit candles as a shared sign of hope.

Over 90 years after the opening of Wren’s new cathedral, it hosted the funeral service of Admiral Lord Nelson in 1806. After his death at the Battle of Trafalgar, his body was preserved in a keg of naval brandy before burial in the Crypt. His final resting place is immediately under the centre of the Dome of St Paul’s.

In 1852, a million people watched the Duke of Wellington’s funeral procession to St Paul’s. The building was closed for almost six weeks while extra tiers of seating and grandstands were erected in the aisles and transepts in preparation for the 13,000 attending.

Imagine the uproar if the building was closed for any length of time to prepare for Maggie’s send off.

Quote of the week

16 November 2011

Charles

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Categories: crematoria

“A crematorium would stink up the neighborhood. Essentially, we would be breathing dead people.”

Stephen Thorburn of Las Vegas in response to a proposed crematorium in his neighbourhood.

You have 30 seconds – impress me

16 November 2011

Charles

1 Comment

Categories: Attitudes to death, death and funerals, Marketing

You’re the first internet based funeral service. You want to make sure people know you are different and you have 30 seconds of TV time to get your message across. How would you do it? Yesterday we presented the advertisement that Basic Funerals in Canada created. You can see it here. We thought it was worth repeating because it highlights the whole question of how advertising works and what sort of message you might want to get across.

Basic Funerals CEO Eric Vandermeersch is clear that, as he launches his new service, he wants to differentiate it from traditional businesses. Cost of course (and it’s interessting that home visits are seen as exceptional), but it’s also about style and approach:

“When you talk about funerals, obviously it’s a sad time, but there’s also a great element of celebration. We’re not trying to make light of the serious side, what we’re really doing is showing people that we’ve changed the model—it doesn’t have to be expensive anymore,” he said. “There is a lighter side of the industry and we’re not afraid to show it because it is the most important side of the typical funeral.”

He added that commercials he’s seen for other funeral homes lack in the entertainment department. “Usually, it’s the owner of the funeral home standing by a fireplace talking about how his family has been in the industry for six generations and it’s pretty boring to say the least.”

You may not do a TV ad yet, but thinking of your website and paperbased advertising are you the man on the right or the lady on the left? And who has got it right?

Funeral spend has plunged in Ireland

16 November 2011

Charles

4 Comments

Categories: funeral cost, funerals in other cultures

From the Irish Independent an alarming trend (if you’re an undertaker) and a familiar issue:

Undertakers say the average cost of a funeral has dropped by almost 40pc in the past five years.

They say cash-strapped families have had little choice but to compromise on funeral ceremonies by foregoing extras that they once took for granted, like flowers, music and limousines.

At the height of the boom, an average funeral would cost €6,500. But it wasn’t uncommon for upwards of €10,000 to be spent up on laying a loved one to rest in lavish ceremonies.

However, it appears bereaved families are more dissatisfied with the service they are receiving from Ireland’s 600 undertakers. According to the Irish Association of Funeral Directors, which represents 250 funeral directors, there has been a “marked increase” in the number of complaints this year.

Many of the complaints relate to the lack of transparency about invoicing, an issue that could be resolved if the industry were better regulated, Mr Nicholls [of the IAFD] believes.

He insists standards will only improve once the industry is regulated, forcing all undertakers to adopt higher standards, improve training and provide transparency in their invoicing to clients. “There are no barriers to entry and no licensing in an industry responsible for the burial or cremation of up to 30,000 people a year,” he said.

Whole article here.

Quote of the week

15 November 2011

Charles

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Categories: music

“Well, there’s me Nana’s funeral song sorted.”

Commenter Tipatina on the Guardian X Factor order cialis online uk liveblog after hearing Janet Devlin sing ‘Somebody to Love’.

All things to all people?

15 November 2011

Charles

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Categories: alternative funerals, ceremony, funeral reformers, funeral trends, Religious funerals

Posted by Richard Rawlinson

For better or worse, depending on your viewpoint, you know where you stand with both civil and Catholic funerals – give or take a few 1,000 variations on a theme. However, I’m not sure what to make of this organisation, and would be interested to hear your take on it. For me, the OneSpirit Interfaith Foundation seems to be forging a niche for itself that sits firmly on the fence between civil and religious, claiming to design funeral ceremonies where everyone attending, regardless of faith or views, will feel included.

Acknowledging that a funeral today often includes people attending from different faiths or none, the foundation supplies male and female ministers who have followed a two-year training programme with the Interfaith Seminary. It claims this training allows for the recognition of ‘the inner spiritual truths of the individual [which are also] at the heart of the world’s great faith traditions’. It adds: ‘There are countless paths leading to the One God / Truth / Great Spirit / Source-of-All’.

This is clearly not just another Protestant sect as it’s aiming to be as inclusive of agnostics and non-Christians as it is those uncomfortable with the organised Church. In fact, the reference to ‘God’ above is the only one I could find on its website.

Of its ministry, it says: ‘We aim to be of service to people of all faiths or none’, citing as an example ‘those who are seeking spiritual connection and expression, yet feel uncomfortable with conventional religion’.

It continues: ‘We are not creating a new religion, but filling a growing spiritual gap in modern society. It’s not our aim to convert anyone away from their faith, but to support people who wish to enquire more deeply into their own spiritual tradition and their own soul’.

Whether agnostic or religious, might this approach be comforting to some in the context of funerals?

I have my own views, but I’d be interested to hear thoughts from the civil funeral perspective.

Cockup

14 November 2011

Charles

17 Comments

Categories: Co-op

We don’t often flag up Co-op cockups on this blog any more because they dim our spirits. We’d rather spend our time looking for people to praise. Anyway, for what it’s worth:

A family is refusing to pay for a “funeral from hell” for their mother after a catalogue of problems – including the grave being dug too small.

Undertakers have been accused of trying to force the coffin of Maureen Shelton, 62, into the grave at Primrose Lane in Huntingdon and then advising the family to go away and come back when it was buried.

Now her family are refusing to pay Anglia Co-operative Funerals for the £2,600 funeral and have had bailiffs sent round in an attempt to recover the money. [Source]

No details of the catalogue of problems. A commenter on this story alleges:

It appears that Coop funeral service has not improved.My Dad died in December 2003,and we employed the Coop for the funeral ,he had lived in the same house for 63 years so we asked for him to be taken from there to the crematorium withe the family following.When we got to the crem I was approached by the funeral director and told there had been a mistake and they had brought the wrong body.They suggested we carry on with the service whilst they went back to swap the bodies.This was obviously refused so we went back to the chapel of rest but rather than a sedate and peaceful final ride for Dad it was more like a race at about 70mph as all other funerals booked for that chapel had to be delayed.The Coop did not charge us for the funertal but did not offer any compensation for the upset and distress,and thoughorly ruined the final farewell to my Dad.

The Living Dead

14 November 2011

Charles

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Categories: Embalming

Enterprising US undertaker Cecil Gilmore is set to offer an enhanced embalming service. He wants to go beyond the casketed look and display his dead doing what they always did — very much in the spirit of the Puerto Rican embalmer who, in July 2010, displayed a miraculously embalmed David Morales Colon on his motorbike.

If a father or husband was an avid fisherman, pose him in his waders and favorite shirt, his cap festooned with lures, holding his lucky fishing rod.

If mother is most remembered for relaxing while watching TV, pose her on a bed with the remote in her hands.

Or, if the deceased was known for his love of motorcycles, pose him in his jeans, vest, bandana – even sunglasses – on his bike of choice.

“The idea is to make people look like they are living, or just sleeping,” Gilmore said. [Source]

This may strike you as being exactly what taxidermists do with stuffed animals. Alternatively, you may think it is the way to go.

Here at the GFG we preserve our notorious stance of ambivalence in all things.

Santa turns Reaper

13 November 2011

Charles

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Categories: Uncategorised

The Daily Mail reveals rather unsportingly that East Enders junkies are going to be rewarded this Christmas day with the festive death from maybe cancer, possibly a heart attack, who knows, of the character known as Pat Evans.

What is it about the British??

Peter Roebuck

13 November 2011

Charles

3 Comments

Categories: suicide

I once saw Peter Roebuck, the ex-Somerset cricket captain who yesterday took his own life. He was pacing up and down outside the pavilion while the pitch dried out, deep in thought, consuming a brooding cigarette. An analytical, introspective loner, he was no stranger to melancholy and controversy. The title of his first book, ‘It Never Rains — A Cricketer’s Lot’ tells you something about his emotional disposition.

The day I saw him Ian Botham was still a Somerset player. (When Roebuck got rid of Joel Garner and Viv Richards because he reckoned them over the hill, Botham decamped in fury to Worcestershire.) I remember sitting watching a damp afternoon’s play. Botham square cut a ball to the boundary with such effortless power that it dematerialised as he hit it and rematerialised a second later as it crashed into the boundary board. It was as sweet a shot as I have ever seen.

Cricket has a very high suicide rate in the UK, double the national average. In South Africa the rate is even higher. Cricketers are the only sportsmen so afflicted.

But suicide is not a problem in the women’s game. And it is pretty much unknown in non-Anglo Saxon countries — India, Pakistan, Bangladesh and the West Indies. Do you know why?

There’s a very good tribute to Roebuck by team mate Vic Marks in the Guardian here.