The sound of muesli

Did you ever come across promession? It is the brainchild of Susanne Wiighe-Masak, an environmentalist Swede. It offers, or promises to offer, an eco-friendly alternative to cremation. In Susanne’s words, this is how it works:

Within a week and a half after death, the corpse is frozen to minus 18 degrees Celsius and then submerged in liquid nitrogen. This makes the body very brittle, and vibration of a specific amplitude transforms it into an organic powder that is then introduced into a vacuum chamber where the water is evaporated away.

The now dry powder then passes through a metal separator where any surgical spare parts and mercury are removed. In a similar way, the powder can be disinfected if required.

The remains are now ready to be laid in a coffin made of corn starch. There is no hurry with the burial itself. The organic powder, which is hygienic and odorless, does not decompose when kept dry. The burial takes place in a shallow grave in living soil that turns the coffin and its contents into compost in about 6-12 months time. In conjunction with the burial and in accordance with the wishes of the deceased or next of kin, a bush or tree can be planted above the coffin.

The concept captured the imaginations of many people. The imminence of the introduction of the first promator has kept us on the edge of our seats for years … and years. I wrote to Susanne in June asking how it was all going. Her reply was as upbeat as always: “The production of the first promator for Jönköping is also well on its way and the plan is to deliver that to them this winter.”

It almost certainly hasn’t happened. Susanne is a gentle person and she hoped that gentle vibration was the way to reduce a frozen body to powder. It doesn’t work that way. She had reached stalemate.

Into the breach stepped an inventor in Suffolk who took Susanne’s idea, ran with it, worked with the University of Hertfordshire and came up with the breakthrough to the problems Susanne had balked at. In his forthright way he told me on the phone that, when you’re trying to reduce a corpse to freeze-dried powder, you need to be aware that “the body is a tough piece of kit.” He does it, not with gentle vibration, but by altogether more brutal cutting and grinding. He can now reduce a body to sterile freeze-dried flakes which look a little like muesli.

He calls his process cryomation. He’s got the finance to see the project through. He’s done trials with focus groups to see what they think of it, even the cutting and grinding. Interestingly, amazingly perhaps, they liked it. They had no difficulty with the aesthetic. Remember the fuss there was about cremation? Remember what they said about resomation?

In addition to finding cryomation aesthetically acceptable, focus groups also liked the environmental benefits: it produces only 25% of the carbon produced by cremation. Best of all, it releases no mercury or dioxins. Furthermore, the remains are compostable and turn to loam in 6-12 months. You could use just one small burial plot for a family for generation after generation.

We need an alternative to cremation. We want to be able to put something back when we’re gone. Cryomation is as exciting and as desirable as promession. But is it simply going to teeter tantalizingly on the brink of imminence for ever and ever and get nowhere?

It looks not. It’s just been shortlisted by Shell, one of nine finalists picked from thousands, for a Springboard Award, made to businesses who “offer compelling plans for a product or service which helps combat climate change”. That has to be somewhat of a hallmark of credibility.

There’s a website, but it’s not airworthy yet. In balancing promise and delivery, these guys seem to have got it right. Definitely one to watch. Mid-2010, they say. That’s when we should start to hear real rumbling.

You can look at her feet sticking out right here

“America,” said Oscar Wilde, “has been discovered before, but it has always been hushed up.”

I don’t want to give offence to any of my many US readers. But for people in the UK who sometimes get frustrated with the way we do funerals over here, it’s worth reflecting that one of the reasons, perhaps the principal reason, why the pace of change over here in the UK is so glacial is that, compared with our US brothers and sisters, we have so little to react against. Here, scandals are few and small-scale, usually the result of the pitiful incompetence of little people, not the systematic malevolence of big bastards. Here in the UK, many of our funeral directors may be characterised as comically self-important, but they come nowhere near the Olympian paternalism of so many US funeral directors with their degrees in mortuary science (tcha!). UK prices are not half so high as US prices. So we don’t duck under the radar of our funeral directors by opting for direct cremation, a practice we still find somewhat breathtaking. It’ll be some time before we pluck our newly-dead from their deathbeds and run them straight to the incinerator. It may just be the case that, living as we do under communism over here (hat-tip to Fox News), we treat each other, on the whole, better.

I don’t cover US scandals in this blog because they are uninstructive to UK readers to whom, for the most part, this blog is offered. I don’t normally stroll into political minefields, either. But heck, you don’t come here for comfort.

The Good Funeral Guide
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