There’s no point in going through the motions just because people you know expect you to. Unless the experience is going to be valuable and of lasting benefit to everyone who comes, a funeral really is just a waste of time, money and emotional energy.

How you feel will depend on:

The age of the person who has died

The circumstances of their death

Your feelings towards the person who has died

Your feelings about whether it is necessary to have the person who has died present at the funeral

The expectations and needs of the people who knew the person who has died

Whether a conventional funeral can achieve what you are hoping to accomplish

Or whether an alternative sort of farewell event would do that better

You may even conclude that you don’t want to mark the death in any way at all if, for example, you were estranged from the person who has died. That’s perfectly okay.