Final Rides & Hearses

The vehicle customarily used for transporting a dead person to his or her final resting place is the classic big black hearse.

There are, of course, alternatives, and your funeral director will know of them. If you are arranging the funeral yourself, you will find that many of the mainstream suppliers will refuse to deal with you direct.

If you think a hearse too showy and would rather have something more modest, something greener, some funeral directors will offer you an alternative – an estate car, for example, or their removal vehicle, which they use for picking up dead bodies. Many funeral directors will come over all reluctant if you do, reckoning anything less than a designated hearse to be less than ‘dignified’. Put your foot down.

Most alternatives to your undertaker’s hearse will be expensive. A horse-drawn hearse, for example, makes a stunning show.

If you decide to hire a special hearse, make sure your undertaker deletes the cost of hiring his or hers. Some charge twice. There’s quite enough margin for them on the hired hearse.

So far as we know, only one funeral director has been thoughtful enough to insure their hearse to be driven by any third party, and that is Colour My Funeral in Solihull, West Midlands. No one else is likely to let you anywhere near theirs.

Variants of classic hearses

There are vintage hearses and limousines available nationwide. Ask your undertaker. Very few suppliers will deal with you direct.

There are white hearses and there are silver hearses. AW Lymn of Nottingham runs the biggest fleet of Rolls Royces in Europe, all of them silver. See them at: lymn.co.uk.

There is a pink hearse. See it at: greenscarriages.co.uk.

There is a 1974 Cadillac hearse. See it at: cadillachearse-hire.co.uk.

There is a bluebell hearse. See it at: naturalendings.co.uk.

Retro hearses

There are retro hearses. The most low-tech of these is a hand bier or handcart, which you would probably be best off sourcing locally. An undertaker is the person best able to help you find one.

Horsey hearses

There is the horse – drawn hearse, traditionally pulled by Belgian Blacks with nodding plumes of ostrich feathers. These declined in popularity after the Kray funerals, but are now as popular as ever and available throughout the UK. Timeless and marvellous, and they move at everyone’s walking pace. Make sure you or one of yours rides on it, not the funeral director.

Motorcycle hearses

There are motorcycle hearses. Best known and utterly reliable is Motorcycle Funerals run by the Revd Paul Sinclair, the Faster Pastor, a huge character and a national treasure in his own right. “Why,” he asks, “should those who love bikes be last seen in an automobile?”

There are some hearse trailers out there pulled by trikes.

Bicycle hearse

The Rev Paul also has a bicycle hearse. Ring for details.

Vintage lorry hearse

There is a vintage lorry hearse owned and driven by the splendid David Hall. He and his 1950 Leyland Beaver will drive anywhere. David has a gift for creating a display on the lorry’s flat bed which reflects the life of the person who has died. Top chap.

4×4 hearse

For countryfolk, explorers and other aficionados of the all-terrain vehicle, Alpha 4×4 Funerals offer a silver Land Rover hearse and matching Zambesi ‘limousine’.

VW hearse

For lovers of the VW camper van, Volkswagen Funerals offer a white VW Type 26 Bay hearse plus fleet of three white stretch Beetles. Alternatively, you can have the 1963 split-screen 21-window Samba. Lovely people. Based in Staffordshire.

Dodge Ram hearse

Thanks, we’ll do it ourselves

If you would like to take your dead person on ther final ride yourself, there is nothing to stop you from using or hiring your own preferred vehicle and taking them in that. Drive down to the undertaker’s, load up and off you go. This way, you can go by any route you want and spend all the time you want – so long as you get to the church or crem on time. Be sure to have enough people to carry the coffin. And be sure to secure the coffin in the vehicle. You don’t want it surging forward when you brake.